Bad news and the teapot…

(Chapter 19 is written simply to Ry x-Berlin).
Out tastes in things were very similar, was this just chance or did I…or we both subconsciously lose our old linings to take on the likings of our other half…she was better than me in everyway and so perhaps naturally, I liked what she liked to be more like her…an impossible task…
At that time in my life I didn’t (had never) drank tea or coffee (I still don’t drink tea I just use it for dipping biscuits…custard cremes and malted milks if your curious).
We like vintage shops and vintage cafés, away from the ruffians in Starbucks ;-)…
We stumbled upon a little tea/coffee shop I’d somehow never heard of or seen in my entire time in the city…and what’s even stranger…I can’t find the thing to this day!
It was a narrow but long building and it was called the teapot…you could but teapots and cups and little gifts in there…I fell in love with the place, I didn’t really fit in with the crowd and got a lot of odd looks…’what is this caveman doing in here’ kind of looks, but I was used to this nature of cover judging…we went there only a handful of times, her friend (the quiet one I liked who removed herself from the room the first time we met)…she hd originally informed us of this place (I made a mental note to thank her).
She drank tea, I drank hot chocolate and we read books and talked to one a other…..I don’t know what’s going to happen in my life, but I know that when I’m a very old man and the days are closing in…I will have some very…very good memories to take with me…
Unfortunately of course there were times when I had to leave, to go home, to work and to study…I took to leaving her many hidden love letters around her room, each one containing a clue to where the next note lay hidden, she enjoyed this. Then one day I decided notes were simply not enough, I bought a large exercise book from the shop and one afternoon whilst she was in a lecture…I began…I filled every page with stories of our life and every page finished with a drawing to Summarise the story within…I left a trail of paper notes, her not expecting to find the book of course and when she did, she didn’t say anything to me, she merely handed me the book from where it was clenched to her body and smiled, slightly confused I opened it and understood…every page was stained with drops of her tears…she liked it…I was happy…what happened next, broke my heart…in a good way…
I was trying my best to shower in the telephone box shower, she was in the room but leaving shortly, I finished my long and painful shower and came out into the room, she had already gone…on the desk…in plain view was a book…I recognised it’s size and shape as one I had recently purchased…the next couple of hours were spent with me…reading and re-reading the story of The Cloud and The Butterfly…she had penned me my own story back…finishing with ‘I know we are meant to be together forever’……………………………………………………………
A new bar/club was opening, a cool, hip place, with leather sofas and decking, the kind of place you smoked cigars and drank whiskey and pretended you liked it…but the music was good as friends were there…so we decided that weekend, we would go……………………………………….
The week leading up had been…uncomfortable, I knew something was wrong, different but I didn’t know what…she hugged mein get and kissed me more sadly then ever before…it was killing me. We were together and close but distant again…I didn’t like it…I knew she would tell me, I never pushed her, she’s known me all my life, better than anyone, she knew if it was a problem that I could help her with I’d have known straight away…this told me this was worse…it must be a problem…with me…not good…
I would catch her now looking at me from time to time and she looked sad when she did…something was coming and i was going to fight it with all my strength!!!
The night of the club arrived…as usual the gang walked to it as we always walked, the city was big but together we didn’t care the walk was part of the night…the bar was (to my shock) beautiful, it was decorated in rich dark wood, arm chairs and benches made from mahogany stood in odd places all around, there was a spiral staircase that led downstairs and to outside which had higher and lower decking it was charming!…as usual we drank and we talked, we all grew so close in those days of drink and fine conversations…life was limitless and problems only existed to the extent of…i don’t think I can get many more drinks in me…but we always did…we were all spaced out through this enchanting bar…some upstairs, some on the stairs and some in armchairs…me and here were sitting on the decking, surrounded by people walking by and the occasional hello from recognised and unrecognised faces…she say legs crossed and I sat facing her with one leg hanging off the decking onto the floor…it was coming and I knew it was going to be bad news…she studied my face for a long time…we didn’t beat around the bush…we knew each other too well…’I’m going away’ she said……………………
I had a one in a million defence mechanism…before those words could slice me open I was able to instantly shut my brain and body down to just become an unthinkable mouth….
She told me the details…3 months away with very little contact…she was beginning to overflow…I told her (and somehow I meant it)…’it fine…what is three months compared to a lifetime’…
She burst into tears and hugged me telling me she loved me over and over…I don’t mind admitting…I came very…very! Close to tears myself in that moment but i held myself strong for her…
I was going to make this work…distance and time I was wrong…they hadn’t become my friend…they were pulling there greatest trick yet…making me feel safe and secure only to knock the feet from under me…
Next…Mr Clyde Cloud…the email…and the end!

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