The year that wasn’t and distance…

(Entry nine-delicious with a sprinkling of loni rose-I never thought.)
The final year of Highschool arrives.
Love had blossomed everywhere, the atmosphere had changed dramatically, friends made and bonds grown over five hormone fuelled years, embarrassment, angst, memories, happiness. Highschool to me was more than I could ever have dreamed it could be! Completing and making the most of Highschool is a right of passage every boy and girl should take! First underage drinking sessions, and maybe if you were a real hero…first sexual experiences! And it all ends with the leavers do…or prom as it’s called these days. The days of year 11 flew by with evil speed…there was no fighting, no arguing in year 11, the end was approaching and we all knew it. Every year me and her began a new relationship with one another and ended it…every single year…except this one, this was the year that wasn’t! I had a new girlfriend now, oddly one of the butterfly’s closest friends…this new girl, let me talk about her before carrying on, she was fiercely intelligent, deeply caring and was absolutely beautiful! She didn’t have an easy time of Highschool, out own year and other years took to bullying her, I never once saw that it affected her! When we got together we were all on our Friday night drinking sessions in the woods, and I remember laughing to myself…all the bullies took turns in promising to her they would never call her again, I wonder what she thought about the strangeness of that night, I smiled a lot. We lasted the year, but no more.
Shirts came out…felt tips pens zoomed across then like cars racing zig zagging through the track, signing shirts is another seminal moment, leaving your comments of love and memories on your friends shirts…a very emotional experience. Of course there was one signature I treasured more than the others. Just when the emotion was reaching spilling point for me (I had to control it…I was the king of the school, I can’t cry). The leavers books came out, this wasn’t just for a quick scrawl and a few xxx (kisses). This was for paragraphs and pages of writing all your memories and love and wishing them luck for the future…I signed a lot of books and everybody signed mine, there were a lot of groups in my year, but I never attached myself to any one group, I was the only kid in school who was friends with everyone…my book got a lot written inside it…sure I was choked up, I wanted to ball my eyes out and kiss everyone…EVERYONE!!! But I held I together. Talk of what happens next spread though the school, college, work, what? I never knew, I had no idea she was behind the scenes trying to keep us together…
I walked into the library one day, and the librarian I had never spoke to said…’Jason’ how did she know my name, I thought God, what have I done now. She passed me a small pile of information, all on one college and the grades needed to get in…naturally I just started at her puzzeled…she smiled at me an said ‘she’s looking out for you’. If there was a moment when I should have broke down…that was it! But thankfully confusion kept me in check. I came down the stairs to see her at the bottom…she saw the information in my mind, started at me (for what was actually seconds) but to me, I could have been there looking into those green eyes for decades, I was convinced I must be an old man by now, then she smiled and turned and walked away. I wanted to drop all the books chase after her, grab her and tell her I loved her…I didn’t move an inch. I was in a relationship and I am an honourable man. Which is why I made the hardest decision of my young life, one that still pains me today…
‘We gonna get a huge limo…cigars and champagne boys!!!’ The leavers do was here and the year was overflowing with pride and excitement, GCSE’s were back we all did good, my favourite teacher hugged me and told me ‘you’ve made my career’. Anything that’s good about me today…she had a part to play in making it good! Tux’s were being ordered and we were ready…the night of I’m sat in the living room….waiting for the limo to arrive and then it hit me…my girlfriend…and her. There is a moment at prom known as ‘The last dance’ where you take up your favourite person and dance with them and them alone…since year seven I had pictured this moment…with her. I knew I couldn’t watch on as she twirled and spun with someone else holding her. And I couldn’t tell my girlfriend who I did care for so very much, I wanted to dance with another, the limo pulled up…I opened my front door and looked at my best friend…he looked at me, the others in the car shouted to hurry, they didn’t share our connection, my best friend still looking at me ordered the driver to move on, a friend like this is a rare thing…I loved two people in high school.
I went to view the college she had picked for us both…the second I walked through the doors of that beautiful building…I felt like I was home. Everything about it was so perfect, it was situated surrounded by nothing but great expanses of roaming fields and farms. There were students laying on the hot summer grass, I pictured the two of us here and it all fit so perfectly. I wonder what would have happened if in the end I did choose that college…I think about that sometimes…not too often though…
Highschool was over…College had begun and ours were very far apart…distance crept between us and I didn’t see her again…for a very very long time…next…the recap…


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